Friday, July 10, 2009

Dr. Love Answers...

Dear Dr. Love,

I have noticed a lot of people recently who have engaged in SL relationships with people who are married in RL. I do have friends who are an RL couple and are not (a couple) in SL, but they are very open in both worlds. I've watched my own RL mother discover some incriminating e-mails sent to my RL father and seeing the hurt at first pained me, and I had a lot of trouble being respectful to my father after that. Most of it was due to my own guilt as I have been known to show interest in someone who is taken in RL. Then I was witness to my mother deciding that the woman was so far away, and he never promised to meet her and, in fact, had not told her anything about what he really did as a job or lived. This still makes me wonder what makes people engage in these relationships. Is it okay? Is it healthy? Or is it dependent on the personalities of those involved?

Anonymous


Dear Anonymous:

You ask the doctor, "What makes people engage in these relationships?"

People engage outside their relationships for a multitude of reasons. Usually, it is simply due to the fact that they want to experiment, to try other things they might otherwise be too shy to share with their partner in RL. This is all part of the human experience. As I travel thru SL, I have come across many people who have loving and fulfilling RL relationships, yet they maintain another and equally satisfying SL relationship. This practice seems to have the uncanny ability to strengthen their RL relationship making it even more satisfying. Life is complicated. Relationships are complicated. If entering into another one in SL helps strengthen the RL partnership, then by all means, have at it.

You then ask, "Is this okay?"

This is where it gets a bit tricky. There are a few areas of concern here, and it would best be served to weigh the answers, think about all of them, and try to make a rational decision based on your emotions and moral code.

1. Are they hurting anyone else? Like the other person's husband or wife or significant other?

2. Is this based solely on a sexual relationship? We all know that if your answer to this one is yes, then the relationship is doomed, so why start it! Sex is wonderful but real and honest relationships consist of so much more. If this "relationship" is going to be a temporary release from the pressures of your RL...or SL...and nobody gets hurt, then and only then is it okay!

You ask, "Is it healthy?"

It probably is but not for the long term! Most of these relationships are based on emotion. The kind where both parties click. Probably physically at first...with some great conversation and sex to follow. Now where do they go? This is where real long term relationships are built. The kind that last a lifetime.

Anonymous - the doctor seems to recall this being his third response to your questions. As much as I enjoy our little "chats", you may want to make a private appointment so we can get you comfortable on this beautiful leather couch where so many others have been helped (winks)...

The doctor's quote for today:

"Sometimes I think we're alone. Sometimes I think we're not. In either case, the thought is staggering."

Peace and love,

Dr. Love



If you would like to leave a question or comment for Dr. Love, you may do so, anonymously if you wish.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Riders for a Cure RFL Surf Open


Until there's a cure, we relay and ride! Our goal is to raise money for "Relay for Life SL". All proceeds from this event benefit the American Cancer Society.

Where: Riders For a Cure (109), RFL Awareness (128, 251, 25)
When: July 11, 11 AM SLT
What: RFL fundraiser and surf competition
Prizes: Trophies and ...

Each participating rider will pay an entry fee of 250L to participate. Randomly selected riders will be called to the water in groups and have three (3) minutes of water time to strut their surf! They can change boards, use HUDs and animations, sit and soliloquize on Plato...Depending on participants and time, there may be a Round 2 and 3 available for additional linden. Judges will score the riders on a 1-10 scale based on no particular guidelines and definitely influenced by bribes donated to RFL! Any board - even an ironing board - is allowed!

Come out and participate in a day where surfers show how much we care, and let's ride for a cure!!!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Mankind Coming to Braata

Braata Beach will be hosting four stops on the Peace, Love, Belief III Mega Concert on July 12 featuring Mankind Tracer! This is a massive 20 sim concert where Mankind will perform a few songs at each stage and jump to the next and the next until he gets thru them all, and the entire event should last about five hours.

Mankind's words:
"I am trying to spread the idea of peace, love and belief (PL&B) to as many as I can. Those who attend my concerts always offer me their thanks for the idea of a PL&B, and I"m so happy so many are taking to it. I want more people to hear about it and possibly feel even a taste of it. I'm trying to advance the spreading of an idea that can help people in relation to each other but, more importantly, inside themselves. This idea is something I have found helps ME, and I would love to be able to share it, to help others in this way."

Braata Beach has the following stops:
Seven Mile Beach - http://slurl.com/secondlife/jj%20Lanes/89/222/22
Tortola - http://slurl.com/secondlife/Tortola/18/23/21
Peahi - http://slurl.com/secondlife/Tortola/221/15/21
JJ Lanes Furnishings - http://slurl.com/secondlife/jj%20Lanes/243/79/26

It all kicks off 12 PM SLT July 12 at Mankind's Sweet Spot http://slurl.com/secondlife/The%20Bay/227/66/26

Sunday, July 5, 2009

ASSOCIACAO BRASILEIRA DE SURF NO SL

Today was the 3rd of 5 competitions in an exciting event featuring the top Brazilian association surfers along with SLSA surfers Colleen Brennan, Wilfred DeCuir, Kimmy Jigsaw, Bobbi Laval, Bonheur Chenaux, Rick Galli and Markfoo Waverider. The results of the July 5 ABSSL competition in the Curcuito Brasileiro de Surf no SL -HP4 Jaws Surf World Cup 2009 series:

Final Winners:

1st place: Tico Bechir 3750L

2nd place: Markfoo Waverider 1500L

3rd place: Beatriz Viper 750L





Colleen Brennan shredding it up



Wilfrid DeCuir taking the wall







Kimmy Jigsaw tucked in the curl
Bobbi Laval skimming the edge

Mori Celebrates Independence Day






The party got HOT HOT HOT at Mori for the 4th of July celebrations! On deck, Socks Clawtooth, self appointed safety officer, tried to keep the danger spots under control, but the surfers and suits were sizzzzzzzzlin' and he definitely had his hands full!






If you have party and/or event pictures from activities going on at your sim, let SurfWatch help you share them with SL! Contact Tauri Tigerpaw and we'll show everyone how much fun is going on at your place!

Dr. Love Answers Anonymous

Dear Dr. Love,


Is it wrong to lust after a co-worker? More than one? Maybe a boss? Especially since we are lusting after pixels, and we really don't get paid? And if they are REALLY Hawt???

Thank you in advance for your response,

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous:

Answering your question about lusting after a co-worker or workers is an easy one for the Doctor. Your question leaves a lot open and it seems you're not really asking for resolution but advice on whether this is acceptable or not.

YES, it is OKAY and not "wrong" to lust after a co-worker or workers regardless of their position, whether they are your boss or a peer!

It is quite common in RL for people who spend time together to become emotionally attached and SL is no exception. The difference in SL, as I've noted previously, is that every avi is drop-dead gorgeous! No flaws and just perfect to the eye. It then becomes all about the real person behind the avi. Apparently, this is who you are really lusting for. My recommendation is this:


Lust all you want after these persons in SL. In your private time, you can fantasize to your heart's content. A bit later on, tho, you need to ask yourself if you want to actually approach these people to let them know your most intimate thoughts about them.

Have some fun, Anonymous! Isn't SL great?!!

We all remember the great line Michael Douglas used in Wall Street, don't we? He said, "Greed is good!" Well, people, in SL, "Lust is good!" It's healthy, it's fun, and it's so sexy!


Peace and Love,
Dr. Love



If you have a question or comment for the Love Doctor, feel free to post anonymously or otherwise. Or drop a notecatd to Dr. Love care of Tauri Tigerpaw. She will keep it anonymous if you so request.